Criticizing the media is something of a sport. There are a thousand novices, and even more armchair coaches. Local leagues can be found in every bar and town hall. Do it well and frequently enough, and you might even be rewarded by joining the big leagues, i.e. the media itself. It’s a self-perpetuating process that I simultaneously abhor and hope to become a benefactor of.

I have a single complaint. Most people have a laundry list, but I have so little faith in changing things as planet Earth circles the drain that I’m only going to throw stones at one aspect of the pit of modern culture. An aspect of online reporting, to be specific.

News websites of the world: please remove your comments sections and burn all evidence that they ever existed.

It’s one thing to maintain an inane mail column or worthless forum elsewhere on the website. But when each article exposes me to the mind-bogglingly stupid opinions of the peanut gallery, there’s a problem.

The dubious trophy of worst web discussion used to be the sole property of Youtube. But the braindead ranting found on Yahoo and CNN make me yearn for the days of watching WoW machinima viewers calling each other gay. That’s an achievement worthy of a medal. Or a drawing and quartering.

The trouble isn’t that news commentary is worse in content; idiocy spreads like the plague in any online community. But the monkeys throwing dung on the wall of news articles are failing at discussing things that actually matter. Miserably.

The counterargument I’ve heard in discussion is that “everyone deserves a voice”. This is a nice ideal, but far from the truth in a world populated by people that would make Neanderthals scream in frustration. In fact, if you can’t even spell the word “voice” you should be legally barred from touching a keyboard, pencil, or chunk of charcoal.

I’ll admit that I’m only one cultural critic of godlike intelligence, but I doubt I’m alone in being frustrated with this. In fact, I’m pretty sure anyone else with a brainstem that glimpses these comments is tempted to put a nail through their cornea. So I recommend putting my recommendation into practice before there’s a sudden spike in sales of glass eyes.

7/12/2010
Email: contact@mwt-studios.com